Most of us have friends, people who matter to us. We try to meet up to their expectations. I am one of those people who have these gifts called friends. And as most gifts, having friends comes with a lot of responsibility. The thing is, I'm now at this IDGAF stage and I don't want anyone to look up to me, to set this standard for me. I set the standards for me, I call the shots! I mean, this life is mine. When, God forbid, shit hits the fan, I wonder how many of these career advisers, morality preachers and so-called "opinion leaders" will be there to help clean up the mess. So I say, lay the fuck off my life, already! I can't please every one and I can't live my life trying to.
So to my friends out there: I love you all! But hopefully y'all will learn to take me, scoin-scoin and all. And for those who'd find it hard dealing with the real me, take me as 'that guy over there', 'cos well, that'd do you some good instead of working your hiney off worrying over what you need to take a chill pill on, or perhaps just let be. It isn't like I haven't always been the real me, it's just that the mind works in a selective way and people tend to see what they prefer to see in you and when they don't, they try to "fix" you. I'm not broken and no, I don't need no fixing. Next page!
Nollywood:
So I was in the waiting room with my friend who went in for a head scan the other day. I didn't mind the TV at first until I heard the following lines:
All this stuff doesn't mean anything. Money, this, doesn't mean anything without trust. I have to be able to trust you with my life.
Snap! I looked up quickly, looking out to see my man "Ace" from the movie Casino (one of the best movies I've ever seen, btw). I could have that movie on replay on a good day and I'll never get tired of watching it. Just writing that part reminds me of this scene where one of Nicky's boys pissed Ace off. And he said to him:
"You took your boots off? You put your feet on the table? You shit-kicking, stinky, horse-manure-smellin' motherfucker you. You fuck me up over there, I'll stick you in a hole in the fuckin' desert."
[Click here for more quotes from the movie]
He's so foul-mouthed, that one! That movie was an explosion: Joe Pesci and Robert De Niro...
EHEN! Back to reality! After I heard those lines I thought it was my favorite movie that was on o, but when I looked up from my book to the TV, who did I see? Ramsey Nuoah (abi na Noah self) was talking to Genievive Nnaji. Worrahell? It was this Nollywood-Casino-wannabe movie sha. OK, well you guys had better get something better to offer through this movie after using that line from one of my best of the bests! To even think that was the only thing they stole from the movie was underestimating them o! These guys completely stole the whole storyline of Casino! The whole nine yards! Kai, Nollywood sha. The only difference is that in this movie, Ramsey was some big boy, butt kicking kingpin, every other thing was from Casino. And no, I won't give it to them. They didn't do a good job stealing and that was the annoying part. That was an insult to my favorite movie and I demand a compensation from whoever directed Rip Off 1 & 2 (that's the title of the Naija movies, for those who care to check it out). Heck, I shouldn't even help them with the publicity, but that goes to tell u how much it got to me!
To Nollywood: It's not all about churning out 100 movies in a month (that's pro'ly an understatement). It's more of quality and the memory that sticks for a long time. So stop with the intellectual property stealing and what not! Let's look within and get ideas for movies, instead of living off what this other people have worked so hard on. And if you have to steal, well, you'd better be good at it.
End of lecture!
Misc:
So I saw this one armed bicycle rider today. I dunno how he does it. He actually looked comfortable on it, which means he's been at it for quite sometime. He was soft-pedaling on the sidewalks. I think that was impressive o, like what you'd see in a circus. I know some stunt ppl do ride without holding the handles and stuff, but this one was cool cos this guy is handicapped. So yeah...
30 comments:
oh pls..dont even get me started on nolly wood...i cant watch a niaj movie witouht fast forwading itt all d time..they waste so much time...they have obvious mistakes and loads of crap!but then are trying sa..the 3rd largest movie industry worldwide...
tthen Goodness knows the spelling of ramseys last name ..it is always spelt differently each time
Nollywood... ol boy forget that side ohhh, thats another story entirely, crap movies they make...
u know what trips me, there is this guy that i have seen in like 3 different movies and he was looking the same, i mean the same beard style and all, like he was shooting all 3 movies at the same period, its so appaulin that they dont even change the way they look to suit thier character...
but anywhich ways, i wonder how people stay stuck on AfricaMagic,,, even my old man, is stuck on iit tooo.. kai
@Pink-Satin: True about the time wastage, too. I could remember this scene where the guy was just pacing in the living room, with this sorrowful tune in the background...of course that was intended to send d message that the guy is musing over something, but 5mins is too much for such "beard scrubbing" and "ceiling gazing"... :D
@AnuBoy: Yes o, na AfricaMagic. I just remembered i saw that logo on the top-right corner of the screen that day. Me, stuck on AM? Na sleep inducement be that...
But all in all, I give credit when it's due...when they have some good script going...
Nollywood has given me cause to cringe times without number.
Every year we have the African Students Association Week at school and it is a pain trying to find films to show especially as we Nigerians are the majority.
So far, we have shown Tsotsi from South Africa. Great job.
I looked for Amaka Igwe's RATTLESNAKE tire, I no see. That is one of the five reputable directors that I will willingly back their films.
About Overbearing friends: do what I do, avoid them for a while. No one can understand what it is exactly u want but urself.
BTW: How far with our peace keeping delegation to Ex's house. The palmwine is loosing potency...maybe because I have been sampling it and replenishing with water.
kingsely ogoro and amaka igwe do try with thier production
My blog friend, ill be leaving blogville very shortly. Ill be back in a bit to give my last comment. Let me go read.
@Catwalq: Lmao @ palm wine losing potency! I'm glad you mentioned a possible reason why it may have lost it! But no worries, I believe by the time Simply is back from the hair salon, we'd be able to pull a last minute thing together, so no fear from that angle.
@P-I: Last post? Man, say it ain't so! Say it ain't so o!
Leave some contacts, man!
Yosh, bighead how now? I love Nollywood movies sometimes. I just saw a hilarious one Tea or coffee. Sometimes though I admit I will fast forward some scenes they are just not realistic enough.
Do you know banex plaza?I am looking for a next alsatian puppy but I donot know if they raised the price. The previous 2 I bought were from Vet world. Do you knowofany other places that I can get puppies from?
@SG: *checking out new hairdo* hmmm, e no bad sha. The weekend no go easy! :P
There's this spot in Zone 4 (the other end of Ladi Kwali, from Sheraton) u could find some guys carrying puppies for sale...just at the junction of the road leading off to the Central Area, under the trees there, and they'd be sure more cheaper than what you could buy at Vet World or beside Banex. And yes, I know Banex Plaza...
I'd pro'ly take a # when next I stumble into one of those boys...
What happened to your other two pups? They've grown bigger now...and becoming trouble? :P
They are purebreed German shepherds. One female and one male. But I need more puppies for protection of my compound. I have this thing about armed robbers... I don't like them at all.. at all...
They have to be purebreed pups I don't like mutts...
Did you and Ex resolve your issue?
did you resolve the issue with ur ex?
The Aboki we dey sell for my home gate in would say, Lai Lai, u can't fit go any where
Thanks for stopping by and being hopeful.
Am actually on my way out now. Ill miss your blog however ill try to keep following. Just keep posting. This blog is another candle in my heart that is flickering with a brilliant glow. Please dont let anyone blow it out
good bye
oh, and i forgot to say, if you find that aboki (the one who sits outside ugo's house), please give me a shout...:)
@SG: You have to physically visit here to determine whether or not you'd pick what they have as per pups...I'm sure you'd find a pure-breed...affordable and you can always visit Vet World for treatment...
Armed robbers, eh? Abj is relatively safe and I don't see dogs as a deterrent to robbers. Of course it works on the alert angle, but I think that's it...
Me and Ex are yet to resolve o! Maybe we need some less eye from the open? You shall know sha... :-)
@P-I: SO it's true? How do we keep in touch? It's almost incredible sha, but I really hope you come back...I'm gonna miss ya, EVERYTHING...
Go well...But I don't say goodbye! I'll definitely keep an eye out for the aboki!
Safe, man!
1. Living in Bondage
2. Ukwa
3.Domitilla..
I stopped there..
its remarkable how the funny ones are very funny. overtly funny. the sad ones too.. v.v.v.v sad
No subtlety whatsover!
no shaking.
*clearing throat* just holla when it is time, I have to send Brother Mufu to go and book another keg. The other one kind of finished. I kind of had a send off for Pseudo...even though he was not invited.
@Jaja: So true, I guess they should stick to what they know how to do best (i.e. real comedy, and not just any cos sometimes they over do it and it loses taste). Not saying they shouldn't try any other aspects o, but let them focus more on those down-to-earth casts.
@Catwalq: Had a "send-off" for Pseudo? How in hell did I miss that? You owe me an explanation. Matter of fact, u should take care of all my logistics on our way to see Ex's ppl!
hey yosh tanx for stopping by jare..hows ur weekend goin
Ha ha... what do you expect? Nollywood apes Hollywood (there is something in a name, I tell you), and ends up looking like a very poor imitation of the original. Pretty straight-forward story. Wonder if they could make a Nollywood video out of that, considering that they make videos out of any story. That is one place where stories don't neccessarily have to pose a challenge. The plot gets too complicated, throw in God at the end!
Nollywood na another sad story....not only nollywood,nigerian artist generally espcially musicians.Americans go realease song,next week,dem don twist am......turn am into thier own lyrics. To Nollywood producers: If you want to copycat..stretch ur neck well,nd copy well,not acting a movie like all una emotions don drain finish.Dats freaking lame!!!
My dear Yosh,the only thing you can do in life is be urself....if u r urself,nd ur friends can't stand it....den dey r not real friends.U have to be urself for u,u come first.......everyone else comes after.
oh gawd pls dnt get me started on nigerian movies....i will go on forever. they all have the same story lines & are boring as hell(i've seen some good ones though).i'll leave it there
just wanted to say that going by the general consensus I think it will be difficult for me to leave blogsville although ill be leaving for Nigeria in a week. I just love all you guys to bits. God bless
btw: i think i'd agree with you as far as living your life goes but it is also helpful if you could draw the balance even though we cannot please everyone. However I would need to re-read and digest before making an appropriate comment...hence ill be back
Totally unrelated post!
Saw your comment on jaja's post about some guy from Abonnema (my hometown) and wondered... you from there??? Plzz lemme know!
Nice blog btw!
hey yosh: what's your email addy?
@Loomnie: roflol @ "The plot gets too complicated, throw in God at the end!"...that is soooo true. There's just usually no reason for that a lot of the time and in the end there's always a "To God Be The Glory" line...
@LurLar: Thanks so much for the words. Those matter. I'm really trying on the "me" side. That makes a lot of sense...
@P-I: Yaaay, for staying. I mean, thinking about it that you'd pro'ly thought about leaving just cos u were coming to Naija, that's not good enough reason to stay "offline".
Btw, some clone PCs, software are affordable down here. You'd pro'ly just need some discretion with internet subscription. There'd be enough help on ground to help you stay on with us.
And I'll work on the creating a balance part!
Travel safe and hope to see you around, soon...
When, God forbid, shit hits the fan, I wonder how many of these career advisers, morality preachers and so-called "opinion leaders" will be there to help clean up the mess." i agree with you completely on this one... i know people like this... but i can't stand any morality preaching of any sort so i take care not to really surround myself with em.. although one does need a reality check every once in a while.. i'm of the opinion that it doesn't have to come out judgementally and all that jazz... so i don't play that... lol@i'm not broken and i don't need fixing...next page(that's classic.. loves it)so so true..
lmao@nollywood.. i'm the biggest fan of nollywood oh.. matter of fact it's one of my life ambitions to be a part-time nollywood actress constantly switching from a non-existent british accent to my igbotic and sometime canadian one. I plan to revolutionize the industry with the power of my metaphors and 'hot legs'... lmao.. matter of fact this post got me inspired.. i'm going to compose a fantastic letter to be sent off to the country's top movie directors... THEY NEED ME!!!
That's naija movies for u-u don't want to see the naija version of two can play that game,they even picked actors and actresses that bear the same xteristics as them Vivica.They really insult our intelligence with most of those films/Rip-offs
Yosh, when are u going to update?
@ONB: Sure they need change in d industry o! The question is whether or not they'll allow the change. It's like most of the other dysfunctional parts, the strings u have to pull and things like these. But that's a good start...we'll like to know how it turns out!
@SG: Soon ;)
btw: on the guy riding the bicycle with an arm...its amazing how you tend to adapt when one loses a part of their body. I think the most amazing is when one loses a sense i.e. sight, hearing etc...I read that those who cannot hear results in the advancement of some other sense. Hope am making sense. E.g you lose your sense of hearing = your sense of smell gets heightened etc. So am not surprised at the gentleman on the bicycle. I remember my last visit to naija in 2004, I observed this guy on a special skateboard...men even those of us with legs will struggle to outperform the dude...he was simply amazing...Have a great day!
@P-I: Thanks for stopping by once more! :)
That's true...I believe other senses pick up when there's some sort of limitation to the overall performance of the body. It's more of a, "make the most of what you have" scenario.
A simple, less life-changing example: Just like when NEPA strikes here, my body kinda reacts in a very quick, but decisive way 'cos I have try and make sure I catch a feel of things around me either by feeling, u know the eye has to adjust to the darkness. That pro'ly doesn't say much, but I know what happens to me at such times.
Have a great day out there, too!
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